What did you mean when you said that?
“I’m fine!” – classically means “I am absolutely not fine”
Idea: A story in which one person says something that throws the entire story off course. The storytelling technique could be told almost entirely through dialogue?
What do we learn from dialogue?
- Personality
- Heritage
- Relationship with other characters
Pitfalls?
- Stops a flow? – depending on the story – less is more?
- Writer’s voice might come through instead of character’s
- Might get wrong voice for character
- Dialogue as information – good but sometimes too much information
Banal conversations – they seem pointless, but are they????? What if they introduce a character, structure a scene,
- Polite everyday stuff
- Bit of conversation
- What is left out, implied? What is revealed? How do people act (leaning in, out) when speaking? What does this mean next to the dialogue?
- What do people want from the people they’re talking to? What do they want in general? What are their motivations? Desire !!
I read an article about dialogue which discussed its purpose; it should break up passages, elicit reader emotion, reveal character, advance the plot or create or increase conflict. These elements are all undeniably useful, and effective when done correctly, I think one thing that is difficult is trying to get dialogue to sound as though it fits. The best way I can see to write dialogue well is to write something realistic. I decided that when I write dialogue, I will speak it to myself, potentially with someone else, to see if it flows well, otherwise it will break the flow of the story.
https://theeditorsblog.net/2011/02/11/dialogue-the-speech-of-fiction/
I have been contemplating my final story idea, and do not know how to introduce the apparition for the first time. I thought that this could be a really useful exercise for me to do this. I loved Elizabeth Taylor’s Voices and the idea of what can be hinted at without being explicitly said. With the use of point of view, as discussed last week using a heterodiegetic narration that zooms in on one person’s perspective, the use of speech in the right way can be really effective. I also read a classmate’s work today, which was written entirely in dialogue, and the development of the story was exquisite considering. There was a sharp turn halfway through, that had been hinted at but that I did not see coming, which amazed me. I am thus going to try to do something similar, although perhaps less shocking.
Abigail sat in the classroom next to the window that overlooked the vast grounds of the school. The window had layers of condensation covering it so that she could barely see out of it.
Mrs Mooney taught History, and she was exquisitely good at it. The most organised person perhaps ever, she swatted at the board rat-tat-tatting away the facts, and it did not go beyond her that there was a reason so many of the boys took her class.
It occurred to her suddenly, as she was about to ask the class for last week’s assignment, that Abigail Green looked paler than usual. Undoubtedly, there were things going on at home – Mrs Mooney was sure of it. She had an intuition like a dog. Perhaps she was just tired. Mrs Mooney did not say anything, nor did she intend to.
Yet, as she moved around the room collecting the tattered strips of paper with handwriting that was sure to keep her up until the early hours of the morning, she noticed that Abigail’s eyes did not move. They were icy cold, frozen in place, staring just to the right of the board.
“Abigail?” she asked quietly, perhaps not for anyone but herself. The buoyancy of the class distracted from her words, and Abigail did not shift her gaze.
“Do you see her?” she mumbled. It was a minute whisper, a curiosity knocking at her lips. Did Abigail want to know the answer? Perhaps not.
Mrs Mooney turned slowly, fear rising in her chest, towards the focus of Abi’s gaze. Nothing. Thank goodness.
Yet, Abi continued to stare. Mooney came to her side, closer, closer to the paralytic state that seemed to scream danger. “What do you see?”
“I see a lady.”
“A lady?”
“Yes.”
“Where is she?”
Abigail did not move. “There.”
“Okay.” Mooney felt her spine’s rigidity as she knelt next to the girl. “What does she look like?”
“Black hair. Well…” Abi’s face changed from fear to curiosity. “Dark, dark brown hair. And her eyes… it’s like they’re frozen. Like ice,” she whispered. Mooney wondered if Abigail had seen herself. “And… She’s not smiling. She’s just… looking. Looking on, at me… through me… no. At me.” She shifted in her seat as if seeing herself in a mirror for the first time. She did not blink, she did not break eye contact with the space before the board. “At me,” she confirmed. And, with that, she became just as fearful as Mooney.
Notes:
- “beyond her” cliche????
- “just to the right” is suspicious – not looking at anything – frightening
- “do you see her?” plays to that fear of someone seeing something behind you, and having to turn around
- “a lady” is childish – not “a woman” – creepier, naivete, childishness makes us pity her, also, children are supposedly more susceptible to spirits https://www.skeptic.com/downloads/why-people-see-ghosts.pdf (although this will require more in-depth research if I intend to include it in my final piece) However, supposedly, children seek recognition in all objects so are more likely to see faces where adults cannot, as a child’s brain is less able to distinguish what is real.
- “the girl” cf. above
Strange Little Stories 